It is a question I have asked myself a thousand times. How can I heal myself? Will I ever heal myself? Where is the end? Is there an end to that challenging journey? When I am talking about “end”, I am not referring to the physical death but to the moment when you look at yourself and recognise that you are not triggered anymore by that situation.
Another question that is important is what boxes do I need to tick before I declare myself ‘Healed”? Is there such a thing as “I am healed”. My intent is not to seem doom and gloom but to open the conversation further, to ask questions that go beyond what Society sees as “I am healed”.
I believe that throughout life, we face many emotional struggles. Some seem temporary and relatively easy to surpass (maybe not at the time) and other ones seem so engrained deep in our being that it feels like they won’t leave without a fight.
In my opinion, there is no magical pill that will make everything go away, there is no one fit all therapy, there is no fast way to the final line, there is no numbing my way through, there is no easy way out. To me, it is a gradual process, that can take time, that hurts because I had to go through the emotions to release them, that is also rewarding because I measured the courage it took to start and keep going, that brings peace, lightness, compassion and understanding.
In my own experience, healing myself emotionally has been (and still is) a lifelong journey. It took me many years to come to that conclusion. At the beginning, I believed deep down that seeing a therapist, doing all sorts of modalities will erase completely the life challenges. Life Challenges are the traumas that keep repeating in your life until it is understood. I am a firm believer that traumas get created at the very beginning of our existence; the rest of our life is a repetition of those traumas: different actors but same scenarios.
How can you heal yourself emotionally?
· Start by realising that you are unwell, unhappy, that something does not feel right in life
· Then ask for help from your family, friends, professionals
· Choose a therapy that works for you (mainstream and/or alternative therapies)
· Allow yourself the necessary time to go through the process
· Be as compassionate as you can towards yourself. Believe it or not, you are doing the best you can
· As much as you can, avoid comparing your healing journey to anyone else’s. Yours is unique and what you have experienced is legitimate, valid, and real
· Remind yourself how brave and courageous you are, that YOU are doing it, YOU are taking care of yourself, YOU are loving yourself by starting that process
That article is one of the hardest I have written. It hits a cord as I am going through another healing journey, one that is close to my heart. I hope that the above can help you start anywhere, somewhere and believe that the next step will be revealed to you.